Imagine if we lived every day like it was our birthday. Waking up excited to experience what’s to come. Feeling a tear-jerking sense of gratitude for something as simple as a balloon. Accepting - celebrating, even - the weather, the work you get to do, the restaurants you get to eat at, the route you drive home, calls from distant relatives, and an individual gluten free cookie. What if every day, we told the people in our lives that we love them SO MUCH it hurts, that we can’t believe they’d give up their evening to sit by us, and that their presence actually makes this world a better place.
Every year, God gives us 1 out of 365 days to remind us why He brought our life to life, here, now. He showed me yesterday (just as he’s showed me the past 20 times before) that my life exactly as it is is exactly as it should be. And wow, does He know how to speak that truth in ways only I could understand.
Fell asleep to happy tears last night in gratitude. Thank you to my people for being my people !! Cheers (literally) to another beautiful year to come.
There’s this really interesting concept in consumer behavior known as “anchoring.” It’s the idea that once a consumer knows of a certain data point (like, an original price of an item) they automatically anchor to that number, and compare all other data to it. It’s why you’re likely to think of a percentage-off sales price as an actual sale. It’s why you might order the second-highest priced menu item, to consider yourself elite without spending the biggest bucks. Doesn’t that make you feel manipulated?
Anchoring relates REALLY well to our perceptions of ourselves, and therefore, what we’re going to do with ourselves. I can’t really say for you what your anchor might be, but try thinking about it. What have you assumed to be? What have you relied on as truth - that in actuality might literally be something someone told you once, and you might have happened to remember it? What have your parents told you you need to do? What has society told you you need to do? What has your major, your school, your neighborhood, your best friend, your boss, your personality type test results told you to do?
What have YOU told you to do?
I’ve assumed I’m a go getter type and therefore have no business doing “nothing” and relaxing for the heck of it. I’ve assumed I’ll always have acne and there’s nothing more to it. I’ve assumed being interested in social media marketing isn’t a smart or fulfilling job and there’s no way I can make it to sound that way, but I cant help wanting to do it. I’ve assumed I’m not good at X, at Y, and at Z. And UGH ! Where the heck has that gotten me? Day 1. Over and over again.
If you release your anchor, started a mindfully awake Day 1, and then continued... imagine where you might drift. All of a sudden it’s Day 365 and you’ve started a podcast, run a half marathon, and moved across the country. Idk!! The world is big!!
There is no standard except grace. Stop expecting something that wasn’t ever a decision in the first place, and start soaking yourself in truth and creativity. Believe in the itch to go do something, or don’t do anything at all. Whatever it is: listen. Mmmmm hmmm things are about to get FUN ☀️
This time last semester, I was in tears sitting next to my bed praying for the strength to endure.
It wasn’t enduring exams, meetings, or schoolwork that I needed help with - it was enduring a week of no exams, no meetings, no schoolwork, and having to wait to go home to my family. YEP, I had literallyyy nothinggg to do, but I had to wait to head home. And it made me sit down on my floor, call my mom, and cry.
Anxiety is messy. It isn’t something that’s easy or definable in any specific way. It’s chaotic, with waves of intensity that come, go, stay, and release. It’s irrational sometimes and rational others, and it’s different for any person that has it. It can be really small and seasonal or really chronic and painful. In general: it sucks.
To anyone out there relating to my messy alone-ness, I just want you to know that even in that lil suffocating pit of chaos, you are not, in fact, alone. You are not forgotten. You are not set in this way for the rest of your life. Even this week, this horrible, paper and ink filled week of “ugh,” will not last forever. And the worst of the worst? Death? It’s been defeated.
When we fear, we block Christ from entering into our mess. We hold our hands up to push things back, and to protect ourselves from anything - good AND bad - coming near us in our depths. We hide, when instead, we should look up, reach up, and hold up hearts to let grace enter in.
Things are beautiful. The days are warm and summer is near, and for the rest of our lives, the waves will come anyways whether we want em or not. But to anyone who’s listening? Who’s struggling? Who’s crying? You got dis.
It’s all gonna be all right.
HEYO. I'm Chlo.
So the basic gist is I’m really just tired of comparing myself to perfect people on the Internet, when I know for a fact that "perfect" doesn't exist. This here is a snippet of my inner thoughts and tidbits of experience, based on my twenty-something years of good ole fashioned, really really messy life.
My wish is for this blog to serve the small voices inside all of us that might have forgotten what being honest online can look like. Leave the hustle behind you, because this here is about HEART.
If you happen to not like what you're doing this season
My 2018 Intentions