I’ve thought a lot about purpose lately. And I’m only 21 years old. I keep thinking I have to look a certain way or be working towards a specific impressive goal to be worthy. Worthy of what? And, who gets to define the threshold for someone to be called impressive?
I have hobbies and I feel like I’m coming back home into myself, because I’m going to stick true to my hobbies because I love to do them and for no other agenda than that. I want to write and edit photos, and then share my experiences on the Internet in the off chance that my adventures might inspire another human to adventure on their own too.
I keep trying to downplay my urge to blog, because deep inside of me I struggle with pride. It’s legitimately the most powerful sin inside my heart. I struggle with narcissism and pride as I simultaneously struggle with self consciousness and fear. It’s a really, really weird balance, and I think only if you feel the exact same way can you ever understand how out of control I truly am of the way those thoughts play out.
I like to write words because I truly believe deep down inside of me that words are our calling as human beings. Using language to drive emotion is something no computer can every take away from me. Computers can be the medium towards which we share more words with each other and combine them in an infinite collection of combinations and mix them up and try them again. But the words themselves come from hearts.
Put together the power of imagery and boy do we have a combo! A camera cannot define me, of course. The quality of my Lightroom skills will not make or break my soul or whether or not I feel like I left a legacy on this world. But every picture in the whole entire universe is different. Every single picture had someone else behind the lens, was taken at a moment in time on a moment of ground that only one human being could occupy. To see someone else’s picture should be inspiring because we as humans are capable of pumping each other up! Someone visited the Grand Canyon on April 6th at exactly noon and I am so excited for then. Someone else kissed under the Eiffel Tower on January 30th right as the sun was setting. You go, people.
I want to use imagery in combination with words because that’s all I got as a human being. You can take technology away from me (I guess, you could also take my camera away from me) but you can’t take away my perspective.
My perspective is mine for the taking for the rest of my life.
To bring Jesus into the fold here for a second, let it be known that I believe God knows what I see. He knows what I’m thinking. He knows what I’m feeling. And He has more power than I do over it all, which means He can change it at any given second. That doesn’t scare me, it empowers me to fear Him and to love Him as much and as hard as I can. To live a life in fear of the Lord is to live a DANG. GOOD. LIFE.
I guess today’s post was just about a lil bit of… why I’m here. What I’m doing. And why for now, I’m going to stick around.
Hi, I'm Chlo.
I've been writing and reading and all the storytelling things since I learned as a kid that if you fold and staple construction paper together, it sort of looks like a real book. I have always craved soul serving stories- ones that melt like butter in your mind as you hear your heart explained out loud.
This here is my home away from home. When I'm not exploring neighborhood coffeehouses, driving down the Pacific Coast (again), or loving on all my people - I'm probably here, with you. Come on in! Scroll around. I hope you feel less alone.